This season asks us to carry something forward, but for many of us, that's easier said than done. An empty chair at Thanksgiving. A family gathering with people who've come to see the world differently than we do. An Advent or Christmas tradition that feels different this year than it used to. None of that has to cancel out what you're carrying forward; it just means the load is heavier than usual. Naming what's hard often makes room for what's real: grief and gratitude, connection and disagreement can all show up at the same table. Showing up as your whole self, and letting the people you love do the same, is its own kind of carrying forward.
Name a boundary. Decide on a topic you won’t debate, a time you’ll leave, or a visit you’ll shorten. If a relative sees the world differently, try curiosity over correction: you don’t have to change their mind, or lose your own, to share a meal in good faith. Need the words? This Headspace video on setting boundaries without hurting feelings is a great place to start.
Make space for who's missing. At the Thanksgiving table, in your weekly Advent candle practice, or wherever the empty chair shows up. Light a candle, set a place, or simply say their name out loud.
Give yourself permission to skip something. A dish, a tradition, an extra stop, a gift that feels like an obligation — without justifying it to anyone. Decide now, and tell one person your plan so you don't talk yourself out of it. Less on your plate this season just might mean more room for joy.
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This content was originally published in United Women in Faith’s Thrive newsletter; republished with permission by ResourceUMC on November 5, 2026.